Right, a friend of mine down the pub has taken in a young dog because the family that had him originally discovered that one of the kids is allergic to dogs.

This little hound is a lovely animal but does not seem to respond to my friend’s commands, I have deduced from this that it is not that it is because it is a puppy but due to it’s former location (London) and therefore it is obvious that he doesn’t understand people in Worcestershire and must only speak Cockney rhyming slang…

I have started on a translation guide for him, and when complete will be printed out and posted in the pub at dog level to assist canine communication.

Windows and doors , paws
Apostle’s creed , lead
Elbows and toes, nose
Having a beg, cocking a leg
Daily mail, wagging my tail
Parking , barking
Give me a phone, throw me a bone
Having a yap, one requires a scoop and bag
Strike a match, catch

This is a work in progress…